Nothing

Hey You,

I still remember that summer. Or that hazy period between May and June when everything seemed overly sentimental like an old Polaroid picture. Already you could feel that that summer was coming to a close - that the time of blue skies, orange sunsets, and humid nights where you laid on the grass while staring at the stars were nearly over.

The summer sun was just making its quick descent to the horizon as I walked, my sandals slapping against the cooling pavement. Just an excited, anxious girl who had no desire to stay yet was in no hurry to leave. Lost in my own thoughts, I suddenly heard someone call out my name. I stopped and slowly turned. And then there you were.

You - with the messy mop of hair and that boyish smile that almost seemed like it was curved in a perpetual smirk.

I saw you struggle with yourself. Hesitating. Like there were so many things you wanted to say, but the words just wouldn’t come out.

So I held my breath and waited. Wondering. Wishing. Hoping.

I don’t know how long we stood there, staring at each other from that short distance. It must have been just seconds, but it felt like time was on slow motion and it was hours before you finally shook your head a little, as if coming out of a reverie. And with a sigh and a smile you said, “Nothing. Just nothing.”

I felt a twinge in my heart, disappointed as someone who had dearly hoped for something could only feel. But then, who was I to hope when I myself couldn’t find the courage to say the words I wanted to hear? So in silent understanding, I returned your smile – trying to mask what I felt right then at my face. With a nod of farewell, I turned and continued on my way, not looking back but with every step a prayer.

Until the next time you call my name again…

Me